FW 14 and 15: A Man’s Type of Woman
FW#14: Pamphlet 2 Chapter 3 The Kind of Woman a Man Wants continued. Subtitles are The Woman’s Woman and the Man’s; Why Elderly Men Marry Young Girls (“elderly” just means older men, not men in their 80’s!); When a Big Woman Attracts the Little Man.
I begin with a story, and end with several more.
A great many women will disagree with what men say they find attractive in women, and may even consider it an insult to their good sense! They think that the man they want would be repulsed, instead of attracted by, a “frail” tender woman. Even when women think a certain woman is adorable and sweet, they think that they could never be sweet or adorable in the same way to a man, because they view it as childish. But it isn’t! It’s a sweetness, a purity, an innocence that is child-like. There’s a big difference between being childish, and child-like, or “girlish.”
Remember that “you do not have to be all things to all men, but all things to ONE man.”
The more petite a woman is, the more men seem to want to protect her. A historical example would be 6’2″ George Washington compared to his 5′ wife Martha.
Are you a tall woman, or not in any way petite? Not to worry! You only need to seem that way to the man for him to be enchanted – and later we will learn ways to give this aura of littleness, or of childlikeness, or tenderness, or frailty to the man you wish to marry (or are already married to.)
His inward nature will appear big and strong to you, and in return, his response will make you feel “little” and tender towards him. Because you have made him feel that “he is a man among men,” you will appear tender, trustful, and womanly to him. The outside world may not see what you see in him or what he sees in you – but who cares what the outside world thinks? (Oooh, this reminds me of a really good black and white movie. I’ll do a special post about the lesson it teaches for FW 16. The picture I’m using is a hint from the movie I’m talking about.)
Today we think of “frailty” as being “weak.” In 1922, it had more to do with being “fragile.” Women were treated with deference because women are more fragile than men. We often are more sensitive in our feelings and in our flesh. We bruise easier, and we have less upper-body strength.
Whether you like it or not, in comparison with most men, women are frail. We’ve been taught it’s a bad thing, but who came up with that idea? (Hint…it starts with an “F” and this group seems to hate masculine men.)
Today, women have a misconception that they are as strong as men, thanks to silly movies, women superheroes, and pretend women cops on tv who can take down any man, no matter how strong. Real life YT videos, however, show us the truth.
I know two women today who suffer from intense non-stop pain, who are now bedridden, from trying to perform a job that was too heavy for them. One was a UPS driver, the other worked in a hospital. I know two others who were addicted to working out who now suffer from injuries to their delicate parts, from doing repetitive, intense exercise such as cycling.
I know women who have blown out their knees and heels from being addicted to running and competing with men and now suffer life-long pain. It’s one thing to exercise and use your muscles. It’s another to become obsessive, like when training for a marathon. There’s often a fine line between strength and injury, which ultimately results in prolonged weakness. Women are simply more fragile than men!
“Toughness” was a backlash to the “daintiness” of the Victorian Era. It was Josephine March shouting like a boy and wanting to remain a tomboy playing in the woods instead of embroidering. Yet even Jo March ended up marrying, keeping house, sewing, and watching over an entire school of boys.
We can be happy that today we don’t have to sew our own clothes, unless we want to. We can be happy about all kinds of new conveniences and freedoms that women in 1922 only dreamed about.
But we also don’t have to keep up the “strong, independent woman” persona that was drilled into us in school. We don’t have to be “tough” anymore. We can be sweet, charming, and ladylike (without being saccharin, needy, or “old.”) If a negative image comes to your mind, replace it with a woman you’d love to model yourself upon instead. Men love to be needed and the “frail” women of yesteryear knew exactly what they were doing.
FW #15 Pt 2 Ch 3 continued. Subheadings are How the Mannish Woman Wins; What Every Lover Finds; Analyzing the Qualities of a Lovable Woman; The Highest Type of Love; The Proposal to Deruchette.
The qualities described in these chapters seem to only belong to the women of yesteryear. It is difficult to imagine a man talking about a woman this way, it seems so foreign. While we do not want to pretend to be someone we are not, there are little ways of speaking and acting that can convey this air of tenderness and child-likeness that awakens a man’s protective adoration. We don’t cover that in this video, but know that it is coming, and it will not make you look like a simpering, whiny, needy, incapable doormat, as some women fear!
In this video we discuss more in depth how a woman who has more masculine traits than feminine can still enchant a husband. When she feels what she thinks is his masterful strength, it will in turn bring about in her a surprise reaction of tenderness, weakness, frailty, and the feeling of being “little” when in his presence.
I also touch a little on Genesis 3:16 and alpha women, and the fact that the majority of men find alpha women too difficult to date or marry, though occasionally an alpha man will love the challenge of “taming” an alpha woman – a man who is strong enough to stand up to her imperial commands – just like in the Elizabeth Taylor version of Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew. Not all retellings are equal, and if you decide to watch this movie, be sure to watch the one with Liz as it is more true to the original story.
When we discuss the fact that we can’t see in others what the “adorer” sees in a person, and how those “invisible” qualities resulted in the saying “love is blind,” I go a little more in depth about the movie The Enchanted Cottage. Be sure to watch the black and white version with Robert Young if you choose to watch this “homework.” I’m afraid the color remake is terrible and if you choose to watch it first you will not like it. I watched it because I loved the house they used for the Honeymoon Cottage, but I wasted my time. The original, however, is wonderful. My next post will be about this movie (FW #16).
We read what Longfellow wrote about John Alden’s feelings towards Priscilla, and what Victor Hugo wrote about the young clergyman’s feelings for Deruchette, and then what Victor Hugo said about himself – not a fictional creation.
I end by discussing early marriages and the difference between Meg and Josephine March on the “fascinating” scale. If you are used to watching one version of the movie, say the 1990s, version, try the 1933 version with Katharine Hepburn, or the 1949 version with Elizabeth Taylor. I think they are superior, but that is just my opinion. Meg exhibits all the traits of a fascinating woman, and once you see it and recognize it, you won’t be able to unsee it. In fact, you’ll begin to see it every time you watch an old movie, as they were well-versed in actual feminine charms, so unlike most modern movies with masculine women today.
Even if you are already married, or you find the pamphlets not-so-interesting so far, the more you learn what they teach the more easily you will discover the patterns in real life, and will recognize that what it teaches is really true!
May God bless you as you begin to see these subtle feminine differences and apply them in your own life!
Janine
Homework: Watch the Elizabeth Taylor version of The Taming of the Shrew and try watching an older version of Little Women than you are used to seeing. You may even want to compare the 3 versions.
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