Fascinating, Feminine Ways 1: Radiantly Beautiful
FW stands for Feminine Ways, Fascinating Ways, and Fascinating Womanhood. This post is the same as the video. There is only the one picture on the video, so that you can listen as you work around your house.
Let’s make this year one of becoming radiantly beautiful! Whether you want to attract a husband, or already have one, I’m going to share with you some open secrets about what really attracts men. Open, in that these guidelines have been known for thousands of years, and secrets, because the majority of women either 1) don’t know it’s a beauty secret because it’s natural to them, or 2) ignore the secrets because they do not believe that they are true. The culture today seems to be leaning towards #2 – women believe the culture’s feminist lies, instead of listening to actual, real men.
In fact, one reason I began making notes on this subject about five years ago is because a 15 year old girl told her mother that she and I were dead wrong. She didn’t believe our answers about what men are attracted to, and what they expect in a casual girlfriend versus a wife. She told us that times had changed and that we were old fashioned.
I knew that the advice had certainly worked for me, and that I had done many things in the book that I will be reading to you this year BEFORE I’d even heard of it (because, after all, these traits are natural to feminine women, and my mother and older Christian women schooled me in many of these traits), but this 15 y.o. did get me thinking, “Well, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe what I was taught isn’t relevant anymore. Maybe the world really has changed that much.”
So I went searching for what men really think about women today, and I compared everything I read, listened to, and heard in real life, with what was stated in these 101 year-old pamphlets.
And I discovered that there is nothing new under the sun! Masculine men hadn’t changed much at all! Some men have emasculated themselves, but since that’s not the kind of man a woman wants to marry, we will exclude them.
Feminine women, on the other hand, seem to be much harder to find. Men ask, Where have all the good women gone? Many men find most young women to look and act repulsively today.
The truth is, that in every generation there has been a group of women who have looked and acted repulsively to society in general, but it seems like the unfeminine group is growing larger with each passing generation. 100 years ago these women were called “Flappers.” In a few weeks we will be discussing the difference between what society thought of flappers then, and what we think they were like today, and why (and who) made them seem popular.
However, I did come to the conclusion that it is easier to find a good man if the WOMAN is willing to make some major changes. That might sound unfair to you, but women are designed by God to allure, and men are designed by God to pursue. Even if you are already married, you want to be adored and pursued by your husband, don’t you?
God has made us all uniquely beautiful, in different shapes, sizes, and colors, and we are a variety of ages. Let me assure you that you do not have to be model thin, nor model beautiful, to attract a man. In fact, the majority of men greatly dislike the woman they love being too thin. Men say it over and over again – they want to be able to grab a handful! When will you begin to believe them? Too thin is OUT.
Now, many of us feel less than lovely when we are in the presence of a model-beautiful woman. I remember in my 20s I was used to average attention from men, and when I walked into a restaurant one day I got the usual nods of greeting, but then the woman I was with, whom I had just met, the sister of a friend, walked in behind me, and the men all went slack-jawed. I’d never seen anything like it. All work stopped while they stared at her. Men stopped eating. She was gorgeous, and had long, blonde hair, and she was dating a popular tv star. Yes, I felt like fried squash next to her. I found out later that she had no female friends, and it was easy to see why. I didn’t like that feeling of being chopped liver, standing next to her. Who wants to feel like that?
So don’t wish for physical perfection, because you won’t have any friends! Life will not be perfect just because you are thinner and have long hair, or blonde hair, or are 5’7”, or have long legs, or have a flat tummy, or have bigger or smaller body parts.
And guess what? The vast majority of men aren’t looking for Little Miss Perfect. They instinctively know that not only are extremely beautiful women high-maintenance, but that they will always have to give into her whims since they know there will be plenty of other men willing to give her her own way. Later, they might have a little narcissist on their hands and then, when her beauty fades, what will she have to offer?
This is why many men who could have the most beautiful woman by the world’s standards, choose to marry women who offer way more than mere beauty, and beautiful women say with scorn, “But what can he possibly see in HER?”
Beauty attracts, yes, but there are certain character traits that are more important. And there are a plethora of ways to attract a man (or your husband) even when you aren’t model-thin, or model-beautiful.
Focusing too much on body weight, make-up, skin care, and clothes, is a losing battle, because we all age, and we all gain weight, and we all think someone else is more beautiful than we are. Even the most beautiful women in the world think this way, such as Marilyn Monroe. Just glance at the tabloid headlines in the checkout line. We wonder, how could he cheat on that gorgeous woman who we think is perfection? (For that matter, how could she cheat on Mr. Wonderful?) Can you imagine the horrors of infidelity being broadcast to the world that these poor, beautiful people have to go through? Don’t wish to be like them. It’s a life of pain.
God created YOU to be a truly beautiful – a radiantly beautiful – woman. He also tells us the secret of how to be that way! It’s not about our clothes and makeup, nor how we braid our hair, though how we look initially attracts people. The Bible says in Proverbs 31:30, “Charm can be deceiving, and beauty fades away, but a woman who honors the LORD deserves to be praised.”
And in 1 Peter 3:3-4, “Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.”
So does this mean that focusing on our outside person is not okay in God’s eyes? No! We ARE to care for our bodies. The Bible says, in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, “Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”
For your homework, I’ll link below a very accurate Color Test for you to take to tell you what colors look best on you with Shari Braendel over at Style by Color.com. You’ll have to submit your e-mail for the results, but I think you’ll be happy that you did. Wearing the colors that look best on you is the easiest way to quickly look younger and more vibrant. The right color even makes you more energetic!
You’ll want to give away the clothes that are not in your best colors. I had to give away a brand-new muted blue dress that I’d only worn once. I loved the fit, but I didn’t feel “wow” in it – and now I know why – it was one of my worst colors! I should never wear anything muted.
In focusing on becoming Radiantly Beautiful in 2023, I’m going to read on YT the original 1922 Fascinating Womanhood pamphlets. There are 8, so it will take quite awhile to go through all of them. Their principles have now been around for 100 years, yet many women have NEVER received the information, because, just like when it was written, the culture is telling us the opposite of what really attracts men!
The biggest reason so many women today believe they are unlovely is because they are constantly being lied to by filmmakers, magazine writers, gay fashion houses, and feminists. Vocal feminists of the last century all had terrible marriages, or weren’t married at all because their parents were horrible examples. They were godless and discontent, and brought up disturbed children who never learned to function in a meaningful and satisfying marriage.
“But Janine! Fashions have changed since 1922! Why should I listen to advice from 101 years ago?” you ask. Great question. You can either listen to the feminist culture you are steeped in, or you can seek out happily married women, many of whom embody the open secrets of these pamphlets. It’s just a lot easier to apply them when you know the truth, isn’t it?
The 8 pamphlets I’m going to read are secular, but they are built upon God’s truths concerning men and women. I hope you will stick with it. Each video will be very different. Some of the content you will love, and other chapters you may be a bit bored with. But they will all build upon one another. If you skip a few months of videos, you won’t have nearly the success you’d have if you build a strong foundation, which is all about becoming a woman worthy of a high-quality man.
Last year we studied in depth Titus 2:3-5 about what God said about Biblical Womanhood in my blog at ThriveOnOneIncome.com. Romans 12:2 says that God’s ways are “good, acceptable, and perfect.” He gives us guidelines to follow because He wants what is best for us! Jeremiah 6:16 says, “Stop at the crossroads and look around. Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it. Travel its path, and you will find rest for your souls.”
But if you reply, “No, that’s not the road I want,” then you will reap the heartbreaking consequences, which often include divorce, broken relationships with children, sexual diseases, discontentment with life, and many other heartbreaks.
The Bible also tells us that the path we are to follow is narrow. There won’t be crowds of people on it because it looks difficult. But the results! Oh, they are so worth it! A loving, joyful marriage, happy children, contentment at home, and satisfaction with life.
And God has not left us to flounder alone. Every day the Christian gets to pray directly to God when they pray in the holy name of Jesus, who is our intercessor. God has also given us the Holy Spirit to help guide us, if we’ll only listen to that still, small voice. When I screw up I beg that voice to shout to me! But He doesn’t. I’m to sit in silence while praying and reading the Holy Scriptures, God’s guide book on how to live a fulfilling life. He wants a personal relationship with you and He’s written you a love letter. When our foundation is built on the Rock of Jesus Christ, He will help us fulfill our destiny as a radiantly beautiful wife and mother, worthy of her husband’s adoration, and her children’s praise.
Every woman is looking for the one man she is willing to submit to, just as Genesis 3:16 says. Our human nature and the culture tells us never to submit to a man, that it is demeaning. Many women fight it so hard that they end up in a miserable marriage that ends with divorce, usually initiated by the woman, because her husband isn’t giving her what she needs. But how can he give it when she refuses to give him what he needs first? Why do you have to give to him first? Because that is the way it works. And God’s ways are perfect. Try an experiment today. Begin thanking the people in your life (especially your husband and children) for every little thing. In time, they will begin thanking you for things you never thought they would.
As I read through the 8 original 1922 pamphlets on Fascinating Womanhood or The Art of Attracting Men I will be commenting as I read, and sometimes I will tell applicable stories. I will not have a transcript of the book, though you can buy the 1935 edition retyped by Cynthia Berenger (affiliated links). I also will not have a transcript of the videos, though SOME of my notes I will post on my blog.
The 8 pamphlets were originally written for single women, and then later Helen Andelin used it as the basis for her book, Fascinating Womanhood. If you want to read her book, I recommend you get the one with the green and white cover, as it is the most complete, with assignments and success stories. The “Vintage Edition” is truncated. For single women, Helen Andelin wrote The Fascinating Girl.
Aida Grey, who pioneered skincare, said she saw the opportunity for beauty in every face. She would tell people that true beauty begins at home, within the individual. “It’s your attitude toward beauty that’s so important.” She continued, “A smile can transform the plainest face to radiance and a frown robs the most beautiful soul. Anger is the enemy of beauty;…it’s a double-edged sword that wounds at both ends. That is my first beauty lesson to any woman.”
Beautiful homemakers, do not think that you are being selfish, or narcissistic to care for yourself and look good on the outside, for it allows you to focus on other people because you aren’t thinking, “Oh, I can’t believe they are seeing me without my make-up!” or “What are they thinking of me wearing these old clothes?” Instead, when you care for yourself the best that you can each morning, you feel good and then all of your focus can be on the person right in front of you.
[This includes looking good for your family! Many mornings I get dressed in stages. We walk first thing. I put on my SPF moisturizer and/or foundation and a little blush. After breakfast and the Bible I brush my teeth and put on lipstick. Before schooling on goes my eye make-up and my clothes for the day.]
Don’t forget to get your color analysis over at StylebyColor.com (the link is in a purple box at the left hand top of the page) or at ColorEnalysis.com. [I am not affiliated with these websites.]
May God bless you as your focus changes to becoming radiantly beautiful to those around you!
Janine
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