Mrs. Muir - An Ideal, Fascinating Woman

There is A LOT happening in this video! I cover many topics of FW in a short span of 36 minutes.

Traits of an Ideal Woman are discussed using pictures from the 1947 movie “The Ghost and Mrs. Muir” during the first half of the video.

Lucy Muir:

Was Feminine, Elegant, and dressed well
She has a Worthy Character
She was a Domestic Queen
She was a good mother
She is child-like (but not childish)
She understands men
She was quiet and trusting
She had inner happiness
She is adored
She shows her man admiration
She states her beliefs, that align with her worthy character
She allows men to help her, lead, and guide
She is considerate and unselfish
And yet she pleases herself by taking care of her own physical and psychological needs
She is not a martyr
She is gracious
She is joyful and displays radiant happiness - she laughs, smiles, and is carefree
She has radiant health
She is thankful and grateful

The Superior Wife Syndrome book is by Carin Rubenstein

Thank your man for every little thing he does for you or for the family, or for work around the house. Notice what he does. Do not be like the foolish women who tear down their homes around them.
Write your husband a note thanking him for providing for you.
It begins with you. Live your authentic, feminine self. Stop complaining and count your blessings!
Die to self. Marriage takes work. Give up your selfishness and you’ll find yourself being cherished!
Be joyful. Thank him. Respect. Gratitude. Alone time. Self-care. Being quiet instead of arguing.

The book Daddy is a Layman is by Laverne Ball Davis. (A layman is a preacher of the Good News of Jesus Christ who hasn’t been trained in a seminary)

LAUGHTER is restful. Laughter is healing. No time for pity parties. Whistle instead.
John 3:36 If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.
Let the Lord Jesus Christ help you! Begin and end your day with earnest prayer to do His will and He will move mountains for you. Persistent prayer gives you mountain-moving faith.
A merry heart. Cultivate it. Laughter is so important.

My playlists on YT:

The Original Fascinating Womanhood Pamphlets
Secrets of Fascinating Womanhood by David Coory

(Links to the books are at the very end of this post.)

Cynthia Berenger:

has retyped the 1935 pamphlets and it is on Amazon
She also wrote A Fascinating Companion – a do it yourself course that takes 6-12 months. Must use with one of Helen Andelin’s books

Helen Andelin’s books are:

Fascinating Womanhood (2007 book is the most complete)
The Fascinating Girl (for unmarried women)

Suggested videos on my channel:

When Queens Ride By
Rose – A Meek and Quiet Spirit

Other mentions:

1947 movie The Ghost and Mrs. Muir
The original book The Ghost and Mrs. Muir was written by R. A. Dick (her real name was Josephine Leslie)

Go to Suzanne Venker’s channel to watch a video with Sue Ellen Browder about how magazines have lied to women over the years about what men want in a woman.

May God bless you as you seek to be HIS ideal woman.

Janine

Transcript of most of the video, at least the first half.

Over the years, during both secular and Christian classes, and in many books that I've read, traits of an ideal woman have been discussed. Some emphasize the Proverbs 31 and Titus 2 women, and many, though few will admit to it, describe the traits mentioned in the 1960’s best-seller Fascinating Womanhood (a book that feminists loathe).

If you learn about these Ideal Woman traits, and then watch either the 1933 or the 1949 movies Little Women (both of which are excellent), you will see that Meg is the epitome of the Ideal Woman from a man’s point of view, and that Amy follows in her footsteps. Beth stays Angelic, never developing her Human side, and Jo…the boisterous tomboy heroine of the story, exuberantly does everything a woman is not supposed to do. But once she grows up, in the book "Jo's Boys," she naturally begins to develop the Ideal Woman traits -- because they are natural.

(Elizabeth Taylor, Margaret O’Brien, Janet Leigh, June Allyson and Mary Astor in the film ”Little Women” in 1948. (Photo by API/GAMMA/Gamma-Rapho via Getty Images)

Unfortunately, beginning in the 1960s, and in some cases, even in the 1920s with the flappers, outspoken feminists began to denigrate the traits that men admire so much in women, and our media and schools have done a great job of getting many women to suppress these natural feminine traits today, by lying to them and showing women in movies who do the opposite of what men actually like. When you have time, listen to the interview of ex-Cosmo writer Sue Ellen Browder over on Suzanne Venker's channel about these lies that were sold to women through magazines.

Yet these "Ideal Woman" traits are the very things that drive men ga-ga (long-married husbands included).

During one class I took long ago, we were asked to name the first favorite fictional female character that came to our mind. For me, it was Lucy Muir of the 1947 movie The Ghost and Mrs. Muir.

I always thought that my favorite part of the movie was the wonderful house, but in analyzing the movie, I realized that I resonated with Lucy Muir's worthy character when I was a child and first saw this movie on tv.

And then, after completing an assignment from the book A Fascinating Companion, I realized that Lucy Muir had all the characteristics of the Ideal Woman from a man’s point of view. While she’s undeniably beautiful of face and figure, she’s also Feminine, the first "Ideal Woman" trait. Look at the lace at her neck and on her sleeves, and the fitted attire that's a hallmark of elegance and femininity.

Now compare her dress, especially the shoulders,

to Martha’s dress:

Mrs. Muir was also a Domestic Queen, another characteristic of a woman who fascinates men:

Here, Martha tells Mrs. Muir that she’s done enough work for the day, and must go upstairs to take a nap. “But I’ve nearly finished,” the perfect homemaker pouts to her housekeeper who does all the heavy lifting:

Now pay attention to Mrs. Muir's fancy hairdo, as she’s tucking her daughter, played by nine-year old Natalie Wood, into bed. It's extremely feminine. Lucy Muir is also a good mother, which is part of being a Domestic Queen. (The book by Helen Andelin said Domestic Goddess, but most women thought that phrase too outlandish and they changed it).

Old Hollywood knew how to dress women. Mrs. Muir was played by Gene Tierney, and her soon to be ex-husband was the famous Hollywood clothing designer Oleg Cassini, who designed all the costumes for this movie. (He also dressed first lady Jacqueline Kennedy in the 1960's.) He had to make Gene’s dresses extra long for this movie because she broke her foot or her leg a day or so before filming began, and was still in a cast when they began filming. Notice how her dress is tapered to give her an hourglass figure. We can tailor our own store-bought dresses to have a similar effect, just by using safety pins and a bit of hand sewing.

Here she is speaking to the Ghost for the first time,

Captain Daniel Gregg, played by Rex Harrison. He is telling her to leave his house.

She is putting her foot down, literally, by stomping and defying him in a child-like way, asking him for what she wants, but not yelling and screaming at him. As he balks, she again stomps, and says “blast,” a crude-word of the day, which made him laugh because it’s a favorite word of his own. “Temper!” he chides her, but she’s already won him over with her tender, changeful ways. This trait is called Child-likeness, and it looks nothing like "childishness."

Then she turns from him with a sob, telling him she loves the house, and that it called to her to rescue it. Relenting, he reasons, “You love the house – that counts for you,” for he loved the house, too; in fact, he designed it.

Handling arguments with husbands in a child-like (not childish) way is a huge reason feminists despise the book FW. But the author, and Mrs. Muir, Understands Men, which is another FW trait. An example of being child-like, is stomping your foot instead of spouting off. It is saying, "Ouch" when he flings a barb at you, instead of just flinging one back at him.

Feminine dress, Childlikeness of manner, in a comfortable and clean room, means she is a Domestic Queen:

When the word “feminist” comes to mind, do you picture a woman who is beautiful, with a caring nature, lovely ways, a soft voice, a trustful nature, and who shines with inner happiness? Neither do men. Say the word "feminist" and people picture loud, outspoken women who try to emulate men, all while trying to feminize men at the same time. Feminists demand that you think like they do, and they'll argue with you if you disagree.

Feminists love to talk about toxic masculinity, but 82% of women say they are not feminists because they like men, and they are attracted to masculine men.

One condition of Lucy Muir staying in the Captain's house called Gull Cottage, is that she move the Captain’s portrait into her bedroom. She does so and begins to undress. Seeing the portrait “watching” her in the mirror, she covers it with an afghan and continues to change into her night dress, because Mrs. Muir has a Worthy Character.

In this next shot, Mrs. Muir has awakened the Ghost’s masculine protectiveness – which is another trait of Understands Men.

Look at that posture! That's a trait of being Feminine.

To make money to live on, Mrs. Muir sets out to write Captain Gregg’s life story called Blood and Swash, as dictated by him. “An unvarnished story of a seaman’s life,” he states. “It certainly is unvarnished,” she retorts as she grudgingly types in words and phrases that are not ladylike and thus affronting her Worthy Character. Typing this book serves as a creative outlet, which is a part of her Inner Happiness, another FW trait. She is also serving him, as he provides for her – another part of Understands Men.

As close to a love scene as you are going to get. Sleeping beauty and a ghost:

The ideal woman is Adored:

And the ideal woman shows her man Admiration.

She has long talks with him, and here she is again raising her pert nose in disagreement, a trait of Childlikeness. Notice that she is not yelling. She is simply stating her beliefs, that align with her Worthy Character. A man in the flesh would not be able to resist kissing her upturned nose. See his smile?

The Ideal, Fascinating Woman also knows to always let her man help her, and lets him lead and guide:

So that they will live happily ever after,

As part of her Worthy Character, she is unselfish, and is always being considerate of others. And yet, at the same time, she manages to take care of physical and emotional needs, and please herself (which is Childlikeness and contributes to her Inner Happiness, another trait of a Fascinating Woman) – and she never acts the part of a martyr. Women who play the martyr through constant complaints, bickering, nagging, frowning, sighing, and outright arguing, are avoided by both men and women. A Fascinating Woman is joyful, and displays both Radiant Happiness and Radiant Health. (These traits are discussed in the original 1922 Fascinating Womanhood pamphlets numbers 1-4.)

So, how do YOU become a thankful, joyful, restful woman? By living out the traits of Fascinating Womanhood. And it starts by thanking your man for every little thing he does for you!

I have heard extremely foolish women say that they won't thank their husband for doing dishes or laundry, or picking their socks up, for making the bed or for making dinner, because they would have to do all those things if she wasn't there - that it is just a part of living, so why should she thank him for doing the necessary work of simply living? To thank him would mean that it is her job, her responsibility and that he's just helping her out a little.

"He doesn't thank me when I make dinner, or do the dishes, or do his laundry. Why should I thank him when he does?" she frowns.

Foolish, foolish women who tear down their own homes, with their own hands and words. These women turn into unthankful, uptight, anxious, shrews. Their marriages don't last. They become complaining, bitter, disagreeable, tense, "Superior Wives;" the exact opposite of the joyful, care-free, companionable, light-hearted, laughing women who practice Fascinating Womanhood.

Wouldn't you like to be thanked for making dinner, doing the dishes, making the bed, cleaning the bathroom, doing the laundry, or whatever other work you do? I just thanked my husband for doing the dishes and he replied, "I did it because I love you." If I never thanked him for cleaning up, how would he know that I appreciated it?

Start the thankful ball rolling by thanking him first, for EVERY LITTLE THING he does for you.

Does he go to work and put money into an account that you share? Have you ever written him a note thanking him for providing for you? Put one in his lunch bag, briefcase, or car.
Does he take your car to the filling station, or hop out of the car to pump so that you don't have to?
Does he run any errands for you?
Does he watch the kids when you desperately need a massage, or just to meet up with a girlfriend?
Does he mow the lawn, or do any other work around the house?
Does he work on your car, or take your car in for service?

If you are at a grocery store, do you thank the checker and the person who bags your groceries? I sure hope you do! Do you thank your server at a restaurant? I'm sure you do. These people are performing a service for you and you show your gratitude by thanking them, even though they are just doing their job - the necessary work that must be done.

If you currently have a paid position, doesn't it feel good to be thanked by the person to whom you have: transferred a call, handed a paper, given a report to, administered medicine to, etc.? Don't people on the receiving end of the work you just did for them thank you?

To become a joy-filled, gracious, rested woman, you start by THANKING your husband or boyfriend, your child, and any other person who does ANY LITTLE THING FOR YOU! Gratitude for others breeds gratitude for you! You will find that the people you thank will begin thanking you for what you do for them, husbands included. It begins with you! And then, within two years, you will find that you no longer have to nag, you no longer sigh in frustration, you no longer have to do all the housework yourself, you no longer feel that there isn't enough time to do all that needs to be done - you are rested, because everyone around you wants to help that joyful woman who is so thankful and gracious to them! They want to see your smile! They WANT to help you! This is the end result of being a Fascinating Woman!

"TWO YEARS?" you may shriek! Does two years sound too long to you? Not to worry. Most women, if they persist, see a huge change in the people around them within six months. It's just that they are waiting for you to change back into anxious-shrew, wicked-witch mode. They don't believe your conversion. They are waiting to see if it sticks. So persist. Become that laughing, joy-filled, smiling woman that you truly want to be. Your life will change for the better every day in small ways as you begin living your authentic, feminine self.

Stop complaining. Be thankful. For every little thing! It turns out that the old hymn "Count Your Many Blessings Name Them One By One" spoke the truth.

Are you disappointed in your marriage? Do you feel like you married the wrong man? Guess what? ALL women - and men! - feel this way at some point in their marriage, usually fairly early on. It takes dying to self - giving up your selfishness - to make a marriage work. Fairy tales aren't true. It takes work, and feeling that you made a mistake in marrying him is normal.

But you want to be desired, right? Cherished even. You have a lot more influence on him than you can ever imagine. You CAN make your marriage magical. HOW? It starts by being JOYFUL and, repeat after me, Thanking him for every little thing. Show him respect, gratitude, and give him some alone time, especially when he comes home from work. If you are disappointed in your marriage, chances are high that you are being controlling and disrespecting him without consciously realizing what you are doing. Many women don't even realize they are disrespectful to their husbands.

I read an excerpt from the 1953 book Daddy is a Layman by Laverne Ball Davis. I loved this little autobiography, and discovered that Laverne lived just a few miles from my home when she was little. Listen to the video as I quote from pages 85-87, and from pages 89-90 and 91.

Now, if you are interested in learning more about Fascinating Womanhood, I am reading the original 8 pamphlets written in 1922 on YT. They were written by behavioral scientists after in-depth studies of men and women, with the intention of helping average women learn how to capture a man’s heart. You can listen to my playlist, or if you prefer written form, Cynthia Berenger has retyped the 1935 version of these eight pamphlets and they are now available in her 246 page book.

Helen Andelin's 1963 book "Fascinating Womanhood" was based upon the original 8 pamphlets from 1922. If you are interested in her book Fascinating Womanhood, I recommend that you buy the 2007 version (this link says 1990, but the 2007 version has the same cover and is a Bantam book). It expanded upon the original 1963 hardback and contains success letters and has assignments. I also have the 1971 hardback and that is lovely as well. However, I personally was disappointed with the "Vintage" version edited by her daughter in 2020 because many biblical aspects were deleted, as well as some assignments, Bible verses, and success letters.

I also have read the book "Secrets of Fascinating Womanhood" and that is in a playlist. This book was written by David Coory, using actual FW classes and success letters sent to Helen Andelin as the model for this novel. It is especially helpful for married women.

If you are unmarried, I’d suggest the original The Fascinating Girl instead of FW. It is very similar to FW, but focuses more on traits that attract men, and omits success letters and assignments meant for married women trying to keep love alive or win back a husband in a faltering marriage. It also ends with advice from the original pamphlets about how to get him to “I do.” I’ve only quickly perused this book, I don’t own it, so I can’t be certain about everything it contains.

I also highly recommend the book A Fascinating Companion by Cynthia Berenger, for which you will need the 2007 version of FW to complete the do-it-yourself course, which takes six months to one year. You may balk at the price, but the book is actually worth the money IF you take the six months plus to read and implement the lessons. You can use this book with FW or Fascinating Girl.

I also suggest that you read the short story, When Queens Ride By, which is also available on my website BeautifulHomemakers.com. My first video on this channel was of me reading this book.

The pictures from this video were of the 1947 Movie The Ghost and Mrs. Muir.

The Original book was by R.A. Dick. The author's real name was Josephine Leslie, but it was written during a time when women authors weren’t often published, thus the nom de plume. This book is quite different than the movie, but I think you will enjoy it.

May God bless you as you seek to be HIS ideal woman.

Janine

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